RELATIONSHIP BASED THERAPY FOR AUTISM- NORTHEASTERN PENNSYLVANIA- SCRANTON/WILKES-BARRE

Autism is not a disease or an entity. It is not something that we must seek out to eradicate. Rather, it is a mode of being, the word “autism” simply being an umbrella term to describe how one relates (or does not relate) to the world. When autism is viewed as an entity, a “thing,” professionals are then led to develop programs that seek to transform the person into something they are not, nor will — or can — ever be. This errant perspective may prove dangerous, as it can function as the impetus to alter the affected person by force, coercion, or manipulation. If an American travels to a foreign country and knows nothing of the culture or language, he is bound to struggle. If an American travels to a foreign country having learned something of the language and culture beforehand, then relating to others and navigating one’s way become much easier. This illustrates the direction in which I believe that programs to aid autistic persons should be geared — not to change the individual, but rather to help them to be themselves, while also having an understanding of the “mainstream,” and being able to navigate within that realm. In my approach, there are some core principles that I find of utmost importance: Presume intellect: Because a person is nonverbal or struggles with communication does not mean they are not intelligent or have nothing to say. Their unique strengths and passions must be explored and utilized. Behavior is communication: In my opinion, the psychiatric community may be making a grave mistake when it simply seeks to “shut down” or suppress what it judges to be “unwanted” behaviors with powerful psychiatric drugs. Behaviors, even those which may be deemed “unwanted,” could be, for some, the only means to convey their needs or distress. Self-Advocacy: If professionals, friends, family members of the individual, and people at large wish to understand autism, there must be a willingness to enter the autistics’ world, not force them to enter the “public world” deemed acceptable. We must validate self-advocacy and seek knowledge about the autistic mode of being from those who actually live it each day. Relationship: To help autistic persons forge emotional connections, make their way through the mainstream, and learn new skills, the keys are relationships. We all must be inclined to forge a bond with the person, to truly seek to understand his experience, unique world, and how he finds meaning — that is, to get to know the autistic individual as a fellow human being. Once a bond is forged, a common healing ground can be created. Respect: It is paramount for respect to exist and abound, which means that we do nothing to force, coerce, or manipulate those with autism. They should be regarded at all times as being worthy of dignity. Again, the “outsider’s” role is to advocate for and support, not seek to modify the person into someone they are not, or need not be. I clearly remember a meeting with a five-year-old autistic boy who was nonverbal. He came into my office and began banging his hands on the computer keyboard. The secretary’s response, as is often typical in those with a lesser understanding of autism, was to immediately attempt to stop the behavior. Instead, I told her to let him continue. There is a ball pit in the center of the room, and I told the boy that if he wanted to keep hitting the keyboard, I might have to pick him up and toss him into the ball pit. He continued, so I picked him up and tossed him in. He got out and immediately walked back over to the keyboard. This time, he did not pound the keyboard but outstretched his hands toward it and then fell back into my arms for me to toss him into the ball pit. He giggled and then spoke the words, “Do it again!” I was amazed. Relationship was at the key of this interaction, and an emotional connection was forged. I entered into his world, and he reciprocated and entered mine.

DRUG FREE RELATIONAL APPROACHES TO AUTISM- SUPPORT, CONSULTATION, AND ADVOCACY

FOR CONSULTATION, contact Dr. Dan L. Edmunds at batushkad@yahoo.com In my therapeutic work with over 100 autistic and developmentally different persons in the Scranton/Wilkes Barre area of Northeast Pennsylvania, there are some core principles I have developed. I have been a dedicated advocate for autistic rights and have developed the International Autistic Empowerment Center to help persons and their families through relational/existential approaches to be able to develop skills to navigate through the mainstream. In addition, I have supported assisted with educational advocacy. 1. Presume intellect: Because a person is non-verbal or struggles in communication does not mean they are not intelligent nor have nothing to say. We must explore and utilize the strengths and passions of the person. 2. Behavior is communication: We may be making a grave mistake when we simply seek to shut down or suppress with powerful psychiatric drugs what we judge to be ‘unwanted’ behaviors. Behaviors, even those one may deem ‘unwanted’ may be for some the only means to convey their needs or distress. 3. Self-Advocacy: If we wish to understand autism, we must be willing to enter their world, not force them to enter our own. We must be willing to validate self-advocates and seek knowledge about the autistic mode of being from those who actually live it each day. 4. Relationship: To help autistic persons forge emotional connections, navigate through the mainstream, and learn new skills, the key is relationship. We must be willing to forge a bond with the person, to truly seek to understand their experience, their world, how they find meaning, to know them as a fellow human being. Once we forge relationship, we can create a common healing ground 5. Respect: It is necessary for respect to exist and this means as well that we do nothing to force, coerce, or manipulate the person. We regard them as a person worthy of dignity. Our role is to advocate and support, not seek to alter the person into something they are not nor need be I share this piece below as a reflection of how we should interact with autistic and developmentally different persons, how we should understand and support. Do not see my disability as the problem. Recognize that my disability is an attribute. Do not see my disability as a deficit. It is you who see me as deviant and helpless. Do not try to fix me because I am not broken. Support me. I can make my contribution to the community in my own way. Do not see me as your client. I am your fellow citizen. See me as your neighbor. Remember, none of us can be self-sufficient. Do not try to modify my behavior. Be still and listen. What you define as inappropriate may be my attempt to communicate with you in the only way I can. Do not try to change me. You have no right. Help me to learn what I want to know. Do not hide your uncertainty behind 'professional' distance. Be a person who listens and does not take my struggle away from me by trying to make it all better. Do not use theories and strategies on me. Be with me. And when we struggle with each other, Let that give rise to self-reflection. Do not try to control me. I have a right to my power as a person. What you call noncompliance or manipulation may actually be the only way I can exert some control over my life. Do not teach me to be obedient, submissive, and polite. I need to feel entitled to say 'no' if I am to protect myself. Do not be charitable towards me. Be my ally as I fight against those who exploit me for their own gratification. Do not try to be my friend. I deserve more than that. Get to know me. We may become friends. Do not help me, even if it does make you feel good. Ask me if I need your help. Let me show you how you can best assist me. Do not admire me. A desire to live a full life does not warrant adoration. Respect me, for respect presumes equity. Do not tell, teach, and lead. Listen, support, and follow. Do not work on me. Work with me.