Wednesday, December 29, 2010
LISTEN, SHARE EXPERIENCE, SEEK TO UNDERSTAND, FORGE A RELATIONSHIP- THE PATH TO EMOTIONAL HEALING.
I recall recently a young man who had come to see me for a consultation, he had made prior suicidal remarks, he was now residing with his biological father after concerns about physical and emotional abuse by his mother. He came in in the most solemn state, unable to identify any of his strengths, and telling me how he felt he was a horrible boy, and that he could do nothing right. I let him vent, and then we discussed the dynamics that led him to believe these things about himself. I asked him what has made him happy, and he said baseball, but his mother would not allow him to play. I encouraged that now he was not living with the mother, that he be signed up for this when possible. We discussed this talent and other dreams he has, and how he does not have to allow others to take this from him. We shared some humor, and by the end of the time he was actually smiling and laughing, something he had not done in some time. This is the key- to listen, share experience, to seek to understand, and to forge a relationship.